Stromberg's Adoption Dream

The journey to our little girl in China

I Don’t Deserve This

Good morning from Zhengzhou. Lars here.

I can’t escape the truth that I don’t deserve this, and by this, I mean everything I know. I was born of two great godly people, healthy, mentally well. So was my wife. Those four special people came from great godly people, and on and on it goes. There are certainly issues in our family past and present, but let’s be perfect honest, I don’t deserve this. It’s what we call grace.

I sit here writing not 6 feet away from a sleeping child who can’t say the same. She only knew six days with her mother, and perhaps father. She knew loving care givers in her orphange, but they will fade from memory, in fact, I pray that the first 20 months of her life might fade from memory quickly because we don’t know what the whole of her life holds thusfar. She didn’t deserve that. I think I’d call that injustice.

The beauty of adoption is that grace triumphs so severely and suddenly. We will call on God’s grace for Lydia as we continue to bond here in China, as we figure out bedtime routines and meals, as we bring her back to Hinsdale to her loving brothers and a church full of grace, as we start to tackle medical issues, as we help her through a life with some significant questions. I trust that God, who is himself Grace, will answer us in His own way. But for all the grace still needed, I’m overjoyed to bask in grace
right here, and right now. Lydia is getting the love and care she deserves, which of course, none of us deserve. It is a reality that we are experiencing here, and it’s remarkable.

Today, we head to Xinyang, Lydia’s home town, by bullet train (pumped for that!). There we will do some registration work for her passport. She is an active and excited child, especially around food, so we’ll see how the 2 hour train ride goes. Katie will hopefully go and tour the orphanage if we are given the chance. Please pray that she’d be able to go and see the orphange. I feel important for one of us to do so. I would keep Lydia while she does that. Thanks for all the emails, comments, and likes. Our inboxes are full and we feel so loved. I’ll leave you with a few photos from yesterday, a couple being from, yes, Walmart again.

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4 thoughts on “I Don’t Deserve This

  1. Maureen on said:

    Does it seem like there was ever a day she wasn’t in your life!? Because honestly, she looks like she’s forever been yours.

  2. My heart is filled with joy and praise to God for the amazing journey He has brought you along to the place where you met and took into your arms and heart and lives, your dear, daughter, Lydia! May you continue to enjoy His grace, as you bond together in His love and then, again, as you bring her home to meet her brothers and more and more family and friends who love her and will continue to pray for her and you! God bless you, Lars, Katie, Lydia, Quinten, and Albin!!

  3. She is SNOW cute! And it sure does look like she has been with you forever! And leave it to Katie to find a Swedish pillow in China – love it! Praying you on through this big big day!

  4. Vernadene Tolman on said:

    I know you will give your new daughter such a loving home and life that she will grow up healthy, strong and full of God’s love. She is one lucky little girl!

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